Lifted Out of Depression

October 2009 ended a 2-year wait for God to grant our prayer for a third child. I was filled with joy.

However I experienced terrible depression. I would awake feeling gloomy – like I had nothing to look forward to. I did not even want to leave my bedroom. Distraught and downcast, I even had suicidal thoughts.

Looking back, I believe what I needed was someone to talk to - someone who understood what I was experiencing. I needed to hear that the feelings I had were real and not imagined.

One night, I was chatting online with my sister. When she said she could not imagine life without God, I started to cry. I told her about my suicidal thoughts, the unwillingness to step out of our home and the overwhelming need to remain in bed all day. I told her that I had a project due for submission in 2 weeks but I had not been able to even start working on it.

Beginning of healing process

God healed me in stages, beginning with my sister zooming in on the possibility that I might be suffering from depression. Accessing the contents of a link she sent, I immediately recognized the symptoms described as similar to what I had been experiencing. Finally, I knew that I was not alone!

I took my sister’s advice to go ahead and cry when I felt like crying or when I had terrible thoughts, and I began to feel better. My concentration improved and I even managed to complete the project ahead of schedule!

Healing Continues

On a short family vacation to Perth, I started out really happy but soon, I started feeling depressed again. At my sister’s church the first Sunday, the congregational singing of “Refresh My Heart”, caused me to weep. There was a cleansing as God’s love swept through me. Although I felt better, I sensed that God would be ministering to me again.

And It Goes On

One day that week, I was so overwhelmed I locked myself in a room to pour my heart out to God. I asked God to take control of my thoughts because I couldn't go on like that anymore. I poured out my anguish to God and He drew me close to comfort me. The light of His love chased away the dark thoughts in my head and lifted the load off my heart.

One More Time

At my brother’s church the next Sunday, I met the pastor's wife, Sister Irene. She asked me about my pregnancy and before long, she was telling me about her own pregnancy experience. Although I did not mention my depression, she said that we should pray against pre-natal and post-natal depression. Then she placed her hand on my head and asked God for the Helmet of Salvation for me. It was as if she knew that destructive thoughts had been forcing their way into my head. Joy began bubbling up from within and I felt liberated.

From then, my healing process gained momentum. I stayed free of depression for longer and longer periods. First, I had a day that was free of depressive thoughts. Then it was 2 days and soon I was enjoying depression-free weeks. By the time the new school year started, I was right as rain. Praise God.

Before I gave birth, I talked to my mum and my husband about the likelihood of me suffering post-natal depression. They prayed for me and surrounded me with much support and care. My vulnerable times were late at night and very early in the morning. At those times, my wonderful husband (he is a real godsend!) would pray with me for God's peace to fill my heart.

God is indeed my Strength, my Shield, my Fortress, my Deliverer, my Shelter, my Strong Tower, my very present help in times of need!

Praise the Lord!!

By Rachel Ong

Worship Leader

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God Gives Good Things

God Gave Me Employment

2009 has been a highly eventful year. I started the year jobless, which is not exactly the best way to start the year, especially in the midst of a recession. My thanksgiving revolves around experiencing God's faithfulness in the form of the provision of a job with a government department. In addition, God also placed in my consciousness a figure representing the amount of compensation I would receive! I believe God wants me to know He does not just provide for my needs and tells me what to do but He really is my loving Father Who has tender surprises for me from time to time.

God Gave Me Spiritual Growth

When I was working in Singapore Campus Crusade for Christ (SCCC), we were given time for activities that enhance spiritual growth.

However, things are different now that I work for a secular organization. That has pushed me to exercise diligence in discovering new and effective ways to be a Christian in a secular work environment. I have found that God blesses such diligence with a measure of spiritual growth.

God Gave Me a Fiancée!

I thank God very much and very especially for Wei Yee - she’s been fantastic. She's always very cheery (that’s the reason I fell in love with her at the start) and has always been very supportive and loving. She always prays for me - even during the times when I was very depressing to be around with (that was when I was anxious about finding employment). She never applied pressure on me to secure employment but instead, remained highly comforting and accommodating.

What a Year God has given me!

2009 has been an amazing year - God handed me a job despite the recession, He enabled me to grow spiritually and He opened my eyes to see what a wonderful fiancée He has blessed me with. For all that and more, I give thanks to God and I acknowledge that indeed when you put your faith in the Lord, He will make straight your path!

By Gabriel Chen

Board Member

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